Or not...

1. Fly to unknown parts.

We like to fish in crowded and industrialised regions.

2.  Choose your fishing companions judicially. We do not in any way recommend you fish with any members or guests of the so called "Southern Gentleman's Anglers Club," a more dissolute bunch could not be imagined. It has to be grudgingly admitted, however, that they can all catch fish. Another reason to avoid them, come to think of it.

Gentlemen pictured:P. Darroch Esq., P. Baxter Esq., R. Nuy Esq., H. McCrostie Esq., M. Rose Esq.

Commoners present: R. Tompkins, M. Hanna.

Commoners absent: S. Neill (camera).

Gentleman absent: W. Baddeley  Esq. (kitchen).

The assembled company are toasting caught fish at end of Day One, and acknowledging the Prop’s duck. Note their willingness to drink anything as long as it contains alcohol – in this case a vile mix of vodka and a popular energy drink.

3. Find a river. But come equipped. Ensure you carry wet weather gear, food, spare flies, insect repellant, polaroid glasses, etc. But, vitally, be careful to carry a bottle of TWO PADDOCKS Pinot Noir. (Or Riesling on a particularly hot day.) This bottle will either be seen as a reward for a good catch, or will prove ample consolation in the absence of a catch. Either way, the perfect accompaniment for a great day on the river.

The prop. is never caught short of the right gear upstream.

2008 Two Paddocks Pinot Noir.

4. Be a good sport.

• always catch and release
• be nice when your friends catch fish, and you don’t.

Karma... Loath to admit it, the Prop caught zero fish all 3 days. Not even a murmur of discontent.

Commoner R. Tomkins catches eleven fish and still retains refreshingly modest demeanor. Only just.

5. Share your Two Paddocks at day’s end. Soothing, celebratory, convivial... You can’t beat it.

M. Hanna has had a ripper day, and naturally demands his chosen pinot. -- TP 2008. Unseen, the Prop is comforting self with a glass of the same.

Our thanks to the S.G.A.C. for  a great time !