NZ Organic Wine Awards: 'Sustainable Vineyard of the Year 2024' plus 2 Gold and 2 Silver Medals. Full details

The Jam

Genius bottled

In response to cries of incredulity from one or two less than loyal friends re the Proprietor’s culinary skills, we present visual proof that jam making, at least,  is well within the realms of the possible for the old chancer. It should be remembered that the kind of competence that one had in the kitchen as a student, for example, does not condemn one forever to the ranks of The Hopeless.

Here the Ironic Chef himself, in the throes of a creative cooking fever, bottles a fresh and fruity jam of unparalleled  splendour.


jam making This small batch is mixed red and black currant, and top notch it is too. jam in small batches


Tips for aspiring jam makers:

  • Use small children as unpaid labour at picking time. This will reduce costs markedly, and give the little chisellers a taste of the life of hard and thankless graft they can look forward to.
  • Give the same unpaid labourers the occasional day off. Get them fishing. This will put more food on the table, while fooling them into believing this is actually recreation.
  • If you are following an actual jam recipe, use less sugar than they say, and simmer for longer.

A day off...

Make them go fishing

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[email protected]

+64 3 449 2756

PO Box 506
Alexandra 9340
Central Otago
New Zealand


Sale of Liquor License Ref: OF129
Licence No. 67/OFF/30/2022
Expires 24th August 2025

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