The proprietor has been travelling the world in earnest these last few months doing what he can to staunch the haemorrhage in the world economy (5/8 of s.f.a.). However he has come to some fairly firm if mildly delusional solutions – some of which he passed on to the charming P.M. John Key last month. We await major policy decisions from Wellington.
1. Apart from some really dud banking, some dodgy bilking from Hedge Funders etc, most of what has engulfed the world appears to have been a massive loss of confidence in reaction to an overblown and over confident market and economy in recent years. In short – panic.
However we think we could learn from (of all people) George W. Bush. Bush, you may remember, rather perplexingly declared war on an emotion - the so-called “War on Terror.” More useful than that dubious enterprise might be a “War on Panic.”
You know it makes sense! You’re either for us or you’re against us!
2. It is well documented that the Royal Navy rationed a tot of rum to its men every day for the purposes of morale. While we should not emulate the R.N. in all things – they did after all invent keel-hauling – we do think there’s something in this. Rum, however would not be our choice as a weapon in a war on low morale – a nice glass of red wine to all citizens looking a little peaky or depressed could work wonders. It certainly does for us. (Do not serve in lead beakers – that seems to have finished off the Roman Empire.)
Sale of Liquor License Ref: OF129
Licence No. 67/OFF/30/2022
Expires 24th August 2025