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31 August 2010
Viva Zapata
New Dog on the Block
We have a new dog on staff: Zappa (or Zap if you’re in a rush - Zapata if you have more time on your hands). He is named as a nod to Mexican Revolutionary Politics, American Progressive Music, and of course Fly Spray.
He lists among his interests -- Agrarian Reform, Stockhausen and Pest Control.
Here he starts his duties on Border Patrol. He is accompanied by a Follower of Zapata, or Zapatista ...
As a footnote , Zappa comes to us, like his much missed predecessor Fire, as a rescue dog. Many thanks to Staffy Rescue N.S.W., an admirable outfit who save so many of this most adorable breed. If you’d like a great dog, or to help, or just to have a look at some shots of some terrific dogs, here’s a link: Staffy Rescue Dogs
As a second footnote:
Note the smart Persol shades worn by the Zapatista ... 24 hours later they were demolished by the said Zappa. Grrrr... |
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31 August 2010
New Chooks in the Vineyard
Stop laughing please
We sport a crowd of rare breed chickens at Redbank, and new arrivals are always the cause of admiration at HQ, although some are rather more amusing than they themselves imagine. The Proprietor frowns on this – even chickens deserve their own dignity.
Here’s one now:
... Alright, just cut that out right away! How would you like it if every time you wandered around the corner looking for a little grain, people cracked up and fell on the ground pointing at your silly face? |
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 26 August 2010
Viticulturist Scrubs Up
Staff Stunned by Suit Shock
The drums bring us tidings of great joy this week – Mike and Ruenell were wed last weekend in South Africa. On a game reserve no less. Mark sent us this shot of the brand new Mr. and Mrs. Wing in the act of splicing the knot.
The boys at HQ, who are not exactly paragons of style, gasped in astonishment to see Mike, not just in a suit, but also sporting a tie. The consensus here is that someone else must have tied it. Not kind, but probably true.
Ruenell looks great, but we knew she would. We are delighted for them, and may have to open yet another bottle of 2007 Pinot in their honour. Congratulations!
 Mark was there, and will doubtless provide a more fulsome report. In the meantime, he sends a photo of this uninvited guest – probably this year's biggest wedding crasher.
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8 August 2010
Farewell to Ed Limato
More heartbreak...
Well it’s all getting a bit much now...
 Our dear friend and colleague, Ed Limato, legendary Hollywood agent died last month. Ed was the Proprietor’s agent, mentor, confidant, guide, and most importantly, friend for about 25 years. He is deeply missed.
Ed was hilarious, loyal, smart, louche, vain, self - deprecating, entertaining, impeccable, generous to a fault, handsome, charismatic, naughty, and altogether delightful. We followed Ed from William Morris to ICM and back to William Morris again. But basically, we’d follow him anywhere. If Ed had set up office in the Congo, we’d have gone there without a murmur.
Like many, the Proprietor is dazed, confused and wondering what life will be like without Ed. And, dammit, without Ed’s parties.
Now, in the interest of objectivity, it has to be admitted that Ed, for all his manifest virtues did have one or two minor, minor flaws. For one, Ed only drank vodka. Not a major vice, but it did mean Ed was deprived of the many benefits of wine. On the credit side, Ed was a big supporter of Two Paddocks, and always had a case in the house whenever he could find it, and would serve it to his guests (and Ed’s place was more often than not full of people).
A truly impressive man, and a stellar career, and we loved him.
So, goodbye Ed.
And look, could we please put a halt to all this dying that’s going on ? Enough already. |
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2 August 2010
Two Paddocks Value for Money
As if you didn’t know that already
It is winter here, the fog lingers, the marrow freezes, the staff prune vines and nurse chillblains without complaint. And the Proprietor naturally malingers by the fireside (a strangely empty space without an old black dog slow cooking herself a la Julia Childs).
This is where and when most of the year’s meagre rumination happens – a paltry business given the Proprietor’s limited intellect and a distinct aversion to introspection.
 But ... forays have been made. Last week, Prop and Mark were in Auckland for a convivial lunch at Soul to mark the new alliance between Two Paddocks and the excellent Negociants (N.Z.), who will now will be responsible for distribution nationwide. An excellent do: top food, and lashings of various superb Two Paddocks Pinots and Rieslings. We like our new pals at Negociants and we look forward to years of fruitful partnership (hopefully they can ameloriate the constant complaints we receive from TP admirers who have trouble finding it around N.Z.) And of course, Negociants loves our wine – we say in all modesty!
Speaking of modesty and our wine, winter rumination has brought the Prop to some rather startling conclusions re value for money.
It may be remembered that we recently drank with some relish a bottle of La Tache 2000 (courtesy of Negociants Australia), a rash move when one considers that one should expect to pay about $2,000 for a bottle of this superb Burgundy.
However, pondering further, we came to the following thought:
Given that La Tache 2000 is, admittedly, objectively speaking, possibly a marginally superior wine to TP 2006 or 2007 (now widely available), either
- We should be charging about $1,950 dollars a bottle for TP Pinot - or
- La Tache should retail for about $60 dollars ...
Mmm. You decide. Personally, we prefer option 1. In the meantime, we offer all our Pinots at absurdly affordable prices. |
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20 June 2010
Company Dog Departs
Mourning becomes us not
 Much lamentation and grief at HQ and beyond (she had friends from all over the world) as last month the dearly beloved Company Dog, Fire, made a dignified and quiet exit after about 15 years of loyal service to the firm.
One of "the great dogs" (see Dean Spanley), the Proprietor in particular is gutted.
Faithful, friendly, and fun. The best of company.
Mind you – like any good dog – she had her faults ... she could drop the worst of farts in a car, and then with a withering look, imply it was you what done it.
She now lies under the orchard and the cherry blossom. A bottle of our best pinot was shared over her grave.
Rest in peace old dog, and may you catch all the rrrraaabbbittsss you want wherever it is you’ve gone. |
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10 May 2010
Wine is Bottled Poetry
--Robert Louis Stevenson
By and large, it is best to avoid making speeches. You always underestimate how much downright thinking is involved.
Nevertheless, we did send the generally unthinking Proprietor off to the beauteous Barossa Valley last month to sp eak at our distributors Negociants’ conference at Yalumba. This involved buckets of meticulous research on the extremely serious topic of actors and wine (or in some cases, any old alcohol will do). Suffice it to say, the association of the two has been a long and satisfactorily dishonorable one. We will not bore you with the contents of he said speech (you had to be there), but it has got the Prop chuckling over aphorisms, quotes and
so on.
The above quote from Stevenson, not so much funny as just true, was occasioned on tasting the marvelous Henschke Hill of Grace Shiraz 2005 at Henschke on the same jaunt. The sort of wine that brings a tear to the eye. The same kind of tear shed on tasting in the following week, along with all the top management at TPHQ, a bottle of the heavenly La Tache 2000 – a gift from the generous bunch at Negociants for having made said speech . (Merci beaucoup, mes amis.)
Anyway, we love an aphorism or two here at HQ...
“I drink to make other people interesting .” --George Jean Nathan
And we love to quote things attributed to better actors than ourselves.
“Drinking problem? Good God no. I never had a problem drinking. It’s the easiest thing in the world” --Peter O’Toole
And so on.
So here’s one humbly submitted by the Proprietor, which was prompted by an interview on TV in Vancouver, and which met with some disapproval in some quarters...
“It is just possible to enjoy life without wine. But only just.” --The Proprietor
What’s wrong with that?
Thanks to our friends at Negociants, Robert Hill Smith and all at Yalumba, and our good pals Peter and Margaret Lehmann. We’d live in the Barossa if we didn’t already live in Central Otago. |
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7 May 2010
Vancouver is Beautiful
Stating the obvious
The top brass have completed their Vital Mission to Vancouver, and the immaculately run Playhouse Wine Festival. We blazed a trail in the Canadian West, jumped off the landing craft and established a beachhead for Two Paddocks, flew the flag with New World Wines, looked and sounded as good as diplomats as we could for New Zealand Wine, and, most importantly, went to some ripper parties. Bad behaviour kept to a minimum, and we even went to service on a very wet Anzac Day at the main Vancouver War Memorial. (Which sits right next to, of all things, H.Q. for marijuana law reform. Don’t know why we find that curious, it just is.)
There are one or two reports on all this in our Articles section, but one reasonably interesting additional factoid – our Two Paddocks Pinot Noir sold out in under two hours. Possibly because the esteemed Anthony Grismondi recommended it as part of his "Perfect Case."
Never mind, more is on the way, and if you can’t find it, you marvellous, friendly, Vancouverites, call Peter or Elizabeth at New World Wines and ask in that nice, well mannered Canadian way you have.
All up, we feel well pleased.
Many thanks to:
Harry Hertscheg
Anthony Gismondi
Peter and Elizabeth Crews
and Shannon Heth (quite possibly, not only the world's most helpful PR person, but also the best)
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29 April 2010
Three Paddocks Harvest
Expect a Two Paddocks Shortage
While the Suits are abroad, at home the grapes are undergoing their annual migration to the Winery, under the stern yet benign eye of Mike. This coincides with the annual migration of The Dog to the Fireside, where she undergoes a slow and blissful cooking process until about October.
So – what kind of a harvest are we enjoying this year? Well, here’s the cruel, cruel effect of a frosted crop - it will bite you on the rear-end not just once, but two years in a row. Because of frost damage in 2009 (it may be remembered we lost our entire pinot crop at Redbank) – we were unable to lay down enough cane to get back to our normal cropping levels this year.
Thus at Redbank we have picked only 6 tonnes of Pinot Noir, probably a quarter of what we should reasonably expect.
And at Alex Paddocks, only 5 1/2 tonnes of Pinot, again half of what we would normally assume would be ours.
A little bit of a heartbreak.
On the upside, the quality has been rated by Dean as very good indeed – all the stats are good (brix, PH, etc.). And our Riesling has again sailed through unscathed, at about 9 tonnes in all. We intend to make a slightly drier style this year, and lower in alcohol – 10 or 11%.
Also, Gibbston First Paddock is still a week away from picking, and all things being equal we may take 11 or 12 tonnes there of excellent quality. Again, anything can happen, and right now it is raining quite heavily.
We cannot see much in the way of profit, if any, for Two Paddocks this year. The dog will have to put up with last year’s coat we fear… |
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27 April 2010
The Rammies
A Big Night of Ups and Downs
An eagerly awaited night in the world of Showbiz and Sport are the annual Rammies, this year held in Sydney. On this august and glittering night the Stars come out for the Naming of the Ram (Two Paddocks), after an individual who has served with particular distinction and flair in his field.
To qualify for a Rammy you need to:
- Be a bona fide Star.
- Be male (we would prefer the awards not to be sexist, but oddly, even in these enlightened times, women seem to prefer male sheep not to be named in their honour).
- Have drunk with the proprietor on many occasions (a pretty wide field then).
(Note : the rules do not actually disallow bribery, but if attempted, it might be better if no mention is made.)
This year’s Rammy, Hugo Weaving, is deeply honoured and humbled to have the Ram named after him, YouGo Weaving. He thanks the proprietor, and his agent. |
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| Almost immediately Hugo’s euphoria evaporates as the news breaks that YouGo has died in the course of his duties, on the job, so to speak. Hugo is gutted as the news sinks in. He forgets his agent. |
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A devastated Hugo is comforted by friends and family. He tries to smile gamely through the tears. |
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The show must go on. George Gregan is delighted to receive a Rammy. Says this is the crowning accolade of his career, he is humbled etc., and thanks his agent. Overlooks the fact that he has no agent. Wishes George Gleegun every success. |
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| George receives ecstatic congratulations all round. Other showbiz luminaries present are green with envy, but in best Oscar tradition, put on good sporting face. |
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| Hugo has pulled himself together enough to congratulate his newly crowned successor. Much applause. |
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| Hugo has a relapse. |
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Others present at this years Rammies include: Richard Roxburgh, Silvia Colloca, David Wenham, Kate Agnew, Erica Gregan, Katrina Greenwood.
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20 April 2010
Vital Mission
Vancouver receives the Good Word
Two Paddocks has sent a top level delegation of Two Paddocks Executives (actually the Propietor and Mark wearing ties and looking uncomfortable) to British Columbia this week for this years Vancouver Playhouse International Wine Festival, Canada’s premier wine show.
Find out what its all about here>>
And another good link here>>
And one more>> |
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17 April 2010
Rock Star in Paddocks
A Lesson in Charisma – you got it or you ain’t.
Our new South Suffolk ram arrived today, George GleeGun. In the tradition of The Ram Name, he is called after a bona fide star – in this case ex-Wallabies Captain George Gregan, now playing in Japan where he is known as ‘”George Gleegun, Lugby Regend.”
At H.Q., we are not at all recovered from the shock of YouGo Weaving popping his clogs on the job only 24 hours ago. The ewes, however, have seemingly taken it all in their sheepy stride, and YouGo’s passing has gone quite unremarked.
George GleeGun arrived in style in his personalised trailer, and was immediately mobbed by adoring fans, they having forgotten the previous incumbent overnight. On alighting, he set to work immediately, getting on with the job.
We wish him all the luck in the world. The vet has issued George a caution not to overdo things...
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16 April 2010
New Pig on the Block
A boy called Angelica
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The boy pig named Angelica |
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friendly and well adjusted |
Out of the blue, a pig turned up yesterday – another kuni kuni - and has come to live with us. This little pig was a pet, owned by a small girl whose family has gone to live in the city. Probably because it’s a pure bred kuni kuni , the pig is fully grown (2 years) but still a manageable size. Unlike the notorious Polly and Peggy, who both blossomed into pigs the size of a state house each? Peggy and Polly now live close by on a couple of hundred of acres of hill country, and they take up most of that space between them.
Now, here’s the thing – he comes already named. Mysteriously, he is called Angelica. As named by his previous owner, the small girl in question. This is pretty baffling.
He does not seem to come with any gender confusion. (In some cultures we would be referring to a “girly – boy pig.”) It is possible, though, that the former owner liked to dress him in small frocks – we have witnessed this strange phenomenon with pet lambs and small caretakers.
It may be, however, he has dark Johnny Cash - type piggy thoughts…
Well , I grew up quick and I grew up mean,
My trotter got hard and my wits got keen
I’d roam from town to town to hide my shame.
But I made a vow to the moon and stars
That I’d search the honky tonks and bars
and kill that man who gave me that awful name.
No. No. We are certain that Angelica has only kind thoughts about former owners.
A very well adjusted pig, who has taken up residence with the goats, from whom he stays rather aloof. Perhaps because they’ve never cross-dressed.
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15 April 2010
Paddock Shock
Ram stiff
HQ reeling today having found our resident ram, YouGo Weaving, feet up, recently deceased, dead as a doornail, karked in a corner of the honeymoon paddock. There are no obvious reasons for his tragically early demise, and we are completely mystified. This was a young ram, 3 years old and in his prime. He was not overtaxed – 17 ewes is an undemanding workload for a chap who can be expected to keep up to 80 girls content. (The ram is the most prodigious male on the planet, in fact.) An inquiry, top level, has been launched.
The only immediate conclusion we can come to is that YouGo (ne Hamish, ne Hugo -- we always change spelling to avoid legal ramifications, so to speak, should their namesakes take exception and sue ... thus Jimmy Baahns , Mel Gibbston etc.) ... the only conclusion is that YouGo died heroically on the job.
There are no witnesses, and the ewes are keeping it to themselves. We see no obvious signs of grief. It’s possible they were not as fond of YouGo as we’d thought. At the same time, there is no evidence of foul play, and investigators are not looking elsewhere. It remains a mystery, and for now we can only assume he overstrained his system in the vigorous execution of his duties.
We salute you Brave Ram, and we would fly a flag at half mast if we owned one.
(We are not entirely sure if YouGo completed his mission, and a replacement has been sought. The ewes are holding a collective breath ... ) |
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14 April 2010
How Wine Led to Science
Thank you Stephen Fry
 Well of course you’re thinking - "Well, I imagine most inventors, philosophers, whatever,* had, like myself, most of their good ideas after a glass too many of their favourite red." And this would in many cases be true.
"Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so that I may wet my mind and say something clever."
--Aristophanes 450 – 385 BC
But actually, it’s rather more interesting than that (and here we give thanks to the marvelous ‘Q.I.’ - and it helps if you read the following connections with the reckless, wild enthusiasm of S. Fry Esq.)
So... We form an fervor for wine, and its beautiful lustrous colour. This leads to the necessity for a suitable receptacle, which leads to the invention of glass. Glass leads to the grinding of lenses, and thus to telescopes and microscopes, which in turn make possible astronomy, biology, medical science and so on. Lenses mean that the useful life of the western thinker is extended by 15 – 20 years. Wine, therefore, is the trigger that puts western science into the lead for, oh, 500 years.
The Chinese, by contrast , although immensely ingenious and inventive, historically never develop a fondness for wine and stick to tea, and ceramics. And tea cups. As a result much of what we now recognize as science is a Western phenomenon and only arrives in the East in the last 100-150 years.
Now, while we drink tea with gusto here at T.P.H.Q. (tea breaks 10 – 10.15 , 12.30 – 1.00, 3.00 – 3.15) we do often ruminate around the staff table how plain progressive winemaking is. At the same time, we are the first to admit we are crap at acupuncture.
* Note the inclusion of this useless word as a pathetic attempt to widen the potential demographic of this blog. |
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12 April 2010
World Class
You said it...
We are happy to see Tim Atkin rate us as one of New Zealand’s 25 "World Class Pinot Producers."
Now that’s a World Class writer for you. |
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 8 April 2010
Chris Cazenove
Exit
Excellent friend, colleague, gentleman, wine enthusiast, actor, companion, genial lovely fellow. Very sad.
NY Times -- IMDb |
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29 March 2010
Romance En Mass
Baahbaah Cartland
| A hint of autumn in the air – always a time in the Paddocks when we get out the violins, and play cupid. It’s a seasonal thing. |
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| This year, the South Suffolk girls have an invitee ram, a big handsome lad, who is loving up his temporary harem for a few weeks. However, things were not altogether straightforward this year. The ram comes with an inbuilt handicap – he is already named -- Hamish. This, of course will not do. We already have a Hamish, our very dopey looking, but actually low-cunning, boer goat. There is no way our ewes would allow a "Hamish" into the same paddock, let alone sire next season’s lambs. |
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We therefore had to make a quick decision, on the ram’s arrival, to give him a new – albeit temporary – alias. (Two Paddocks followers know that to be named after one of our rams is a much sought after honour in the world of show biz... up there with a Golden Globe.)
This year... [drum roll]... The Illustrious Honour of the Ram Naming ... goes to... [open envelope ].... HUGO WEAVING!
So, here he is, Hugo, with his gang of girls,17 altogether. As you can see, he likes to keep them close, in a tight huddle. He’s the big outrageously unshorn chap in the middle. Do not catch his eye... he’s a fairly single minded fellow. |
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And the girls seem to like it that way. They’re huddling all day.
Go figure.
We will report on Hugo’s performance in the spring. We judge things on results. Watch this space...
And, while we’re at it, here’s another sheep – a former pet lamb somewhat imaginatively called Baa Baa by a somewhat small child. Baa Baa is still everyone’s pet, a surprisingly affectionate animal. |
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26 March 2010
Wine, Women and Song
It's a wonderful life
Can one imagine a more sublime combination? Think about it...
The slightest change and it all goes pear shaped, and you run screaming for cover. Try this:
Wine, Blokes, and Song ... no thanks.
Beer, Women, and Song ... too Munich by far.
Wine, Women, and Soccer ... ghastly.
You can play this game endlessly, and end up entertained, but back where you started — in the full and certain knowledge that life does not get better than that — wine, women, and song.
Here's the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam on that very subject — don’t ever say this site is not erudite.
A Book of Verses underneath the Bough,
A Jug of Wine, a Loaf of Bread – and Thou
Beside me singing in the Wilderness.
Oh, Wilderness were Paradise enow!
And, just for fun, here’s three very different songs called Wine Women and Song.
(In fact, there may be a cautionary element in the previous material. This is because, in some quarters, wine, women and song are seen as something to be avoided, the way to perdition, etc. We strongly disagree. So feel free to ignore, but don’t blame us if you do. You have been warned... moderation, and so on...) |
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15 March 2010
Negociants out to Lunch
Hands across the ditch
This last fortnight we have twice been delighted to host our friends and distributors from Australia, Negociants, along with some of their key clients. (Two Paddocks fans, naturally.)
Mark, Diane and Karen cooked, along with Bob on the barbecue.
Although the staff were instructed to scrub up, Bob insisted on putting his knees on display both days. This caused some consternation among the women from Australia, who had never seen anything like them.
Wines were tasted, conversation became lively and the Prop. told stories about going over the top. Which war he was referring to will never be known.
Good bunch both days, and welcome any time.
Our friends from Negociants and some of their key clients.
Negotiants team includes:
Tim Evans, Neil Corston, Simon Traill, Dean Mitchell
From South Australia:
Marina Goldsworthy – Edinburgh Cellars, Mitcham
Sally Ann Johnson – Edinburgh Cellars, Mitcham
Tom Skipper – The Maid & Magpie Hotel, Stepney
From Melbourne:
Neil Davison – Coppins Group
John Corrigan – Prince Wine Store
Jeff Mickan – Templestowe Cellars
From Perth:
Jeremy Cariss – Bistro Felix – Subiaco
Aaron Commins – Must Wine Bar, Highgate
Moreno Berti – The Re Store, Leederville |
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More friends from Negociants and some of their key clients.
Negociants team includes:
Annie Rowe, Michael Jarman, Chris Denton.
Others include:
Garth Oldfield – Wine Culture, Roseville Chase, Sydney
Anthony Snell – Terrey Hills Liquor, Terrey Hills, Sidney
Raylene Burns – Ferry Road Fine Wine, Southport, Brisbane
Graham & Kaye Pearson – The Cellar Group, Byron Bay, Brisbane
Graham Sutherland – Cru Bar & Cellar, Fortitude Valley, Brisbane |
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| Dean Shaw and Graham Sutherland sample the wine. |
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10 March 2010
Two Paddocks for Diets! Startling News from Health Front!
Who Knew?
We love diligent and comprehensive research into the health benefits or otherwise of wine, and we love the Southland Times - always up to the minute.
I don’t carry one of those annoying water bottles to the gym any more" |
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Our local paper yesterday quotes The Sunday Times in an article from Boston about a new study that suggests that "Women who like a glass of wine after work can relax: they are likely to gain less weight than those who stick to mineral water."
Look at reports past on this blog – it seems as if not only does red wine have properties that may lead to sweeter breath, a longer life, a happier life etc., (in moderation), but now it seems to have dieting advantages!
"Women who are moderate drinkers also have a lower risk of obesity than teetotalers, according to new research. The findings, from a study of 19,000 women, are at odds with dietary advice that drinking alcohol leads to weight gain.
"The research suggests a calorie from alcohol has less impact than a calorie from other foods, and that the way the body deals with alcohol is more complex than previously realised.
"One theory is that in regular drinkers the liver develops a separate metabolic pathway to break down alcohol, with surplus energy turned mainly into heat, instead of fat. {here’s the good bit...} In the study, red wine was associated with the lowest weight gain; beer and spirits were linked to the highest weight gain."
Hurrah! Cheers, you slim thing!
We imagine women all over the world, cooing at their svelte selves in the mirror - "Thanks Two Paddocks!"
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9 March 2010
Extreme Drinker's Challenge
In moderation only -- please.
We invite you to drink Two Paddocks somewhere extreme -- marvelous, beautiful, scary, paradisiacal. You choose.
And, if it measures up to the circumstances, and we know it will, let us know. We’d like to see you having a glass or bottle on Everest, say, or the Eiffel Tower, or the space station, or onstage at La Scala, at 10 Downing St. in the P.M.’s office, in the Rio Mardi Gras parade. Come on! go for it! Put the bottle in the shot though... |
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9 March 2010
Extreme Drinking
In moderation only, naturally.
Here at T.P.H.Q., we test our superb wines under the most extreme conditions, in order to satisfy ourselves that they stand up to the most trying of conditions, thereby ensuring that you, our valued customer, will enjoy them as we do wherever you are.
For instance, recently we realized we had to put our wine up against the most extreme conditions in terms of physically beauty, and assess if the wine could acquit itself well, i.e. be as gloriously gorgeous as the surroundings, or just slip by unnoticed.
Would T.P. stand up here, in The Valley Of The Gods? |
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P. Baxter, Esq., bon vivant, adventurer, fisherman and extreme palate, and the Proprietor were selected for this most exacting of tasks, and graciously shouldered their burden without a murmur of complaint. Yesterday they journeyed far into the hinterland carrying a precious bottle of Two Paddocks First Paddock 2007, and put it to the test in a valley of such isolation and grandeur only the most sumptuous of wines would even get a look in.
While allowing the wine to acclimatise, and waiting for lunch, the Two Palates® permitted themselves a quick fish to get their minds off the tension and excitement before the Big Test
Fish were caught. And released.
Rainbows and Browns. |
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At 13:07 hours, P.B. did the honours, and eased the Stelvin off the top. Silence fell as the
Two Palates carefully tasted as objectively and comprehensively as possible. The Pinot was tried both with and without food (bacon and egg pie, courtesy the Baxter kitchen).
Two Palates at work. |
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At 13:27 hours a verdict was reached.
Result: Unanimous -- 5 Stars, even under these most trying conditions.
We, the jury, find that you, the wine buff, can take your T.P. anywhere with confidence.
Footnote : R. Tompkins and M. Hanna were downstream, but God alone knows what they were drinking, since they had absolutely no recall at day’s end. |
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2 March 2010
A Smooth Team
Setting an example in the tailoring area.
We may dress informally for work at T P H Q, but for special occasions, like yesterday’s tasting for our 2009 wines, we always put on our best clothes.
Yes, we turned out well for our initial barrel sample look, and our first thoughts lead us to conclude that 2009 should produce an excellent Two Paddocks Pinot Noir – a combination of largely the best of Last Chance and First Paddock, as well as our always charming Picnic.
Put a penny in the piggy bank now!
Our top team puts Savile Row to shame on a good day - left to right:
Dean Shaw (winemaker)
Mike Wing (viticulturalist)
S. Neill (Prop.)
Mark Field (manager) |
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2 March 2010
Two Paddocks Admirers
Once in a while our mailbox contains a letter which tickles us greatly.
This one is from Croatia – our wine travellled 1800 miles to our friend Saša Zavrtnik.
We put it in the articles page - take a look>>. |
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1 March 2010
Two More Chaps Who Know What’s What
We also want to note two further palates who have graced our humble paddocks this last month.
- David Strada -- New Zealand Wine Growers man in the United States.
- Harald Hertscheg -- runs the extraordinary Vancouver Playhouse Wine Festival. We will be making an appearance there this year.
Cheers Gents! |
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1 March 2010
How to Fish like a Gentleman
Or not...
1. Fly to unknown parts.
We like to fish in crowded and industrialised regions. |
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2. Choose your fishing companions judicially. We do not in any way recommend you fish with any members or guests of the so called "Southern Gentleman's Anglers Club," a more dissolute bunch could not be imagined. It has to be grudgingly admitted, however, that they can all catch fish. Another reason to avoid them, come to think of it.
Gentlemen pictured:
P. Darroch Esq., P. Baxter Esq., R. Nuy Esq., H. McCrostie Esq., M. Rose Esq.
Commoners present:
R. Tompkins, M. Hanna.
Commoners absent:
S. Neill (camera).
Gentleman absent:
W. Baddeley Esq. (kitchen).
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| The assembled company are toasting caught fish at end of Day One, and acknowledging the Prop’s duck. Note their willingness to drink anything as long as it contains alcohol – in this case a vile mix of vodka and a popular energy drink. |
3. Find a river. But come equipped. Ensure you carry wet weather gear, food, spare flies, insect repellant, polaroid glasses, etc. But, vitally, be careful to carry a bottle of TWO PADDOCKS Pinot Noir. (Or Riesling on a particularly hot day.) This bottle will either be seen as a reward for a good catch, or will prove ample consolation in the absence of a catch. Either way, the perfect accompaniment for a great day on the river.
The prop. is never caught short of the right gear upstream. |
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| 2008 Two Paddocks Pinot Noir. |
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4. Be a good sport.
- always catch and release
- be nice when your friends catch fish, and you don’t.
Karma... Loath to admit it, the Prop caught zero fish all 3 days. Not even a murmur of discontent.
Commoner R. Tomkins catches eleven fish and still retains refreshingly modest demeanor. Only just. |
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5. Share your Two Paddocks at day’s end. Soothing, celebratory, convivial... You can’t beat it.
M. Hanna has had a ripper day, and naturally demands his chosen pinot. -- TP 2008. Unseen, the Prop is comforting self with a glass of the same. |
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| Our thanks to the S.G.A.C. for a great time ! |
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24 February 2010
Five Stars
Nice one.
We note Michael Cooper's Guide to New Zealand Wine 2010 awards Two Paddocks First Paddock 2007 no less than 5 Stars.
Good – oh.
Stellar Pinot. |
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23 February 2010
Kiwi Excellence
Once or twice a year we hand out a case of wine each to New Zealanders, usually in the arts, who have given the Prop. some pleasure recently. This is pretty unscientific – more the occasional whim, since so many Kiwis have the constant and ongoing admiration of us here at H. Q.
But here is a partial list so far this year.
- Ralph Hotere – artist and eminence grise
- Che Fu – singer and musician
- Gillian Whitehead – composer
- The cast of Outrageous Fortune - producer John Laing
- Richard Nunns – musician and musical archeologist (?)
Two Paddocks is also a long time supporter of the Royal New Zealand Ballet. |
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22 February 2010
After a Time of Wonder...
Cool Chicks
One of our old brown hens surprised us yesterday by emerging from the tussocks with 6-day old chicks. She’d been a bit of a nuisance of late hanging around the staff room. Turns out she was separating herself from the mob in order to quietly hatch her eggs in private. Coincidentally, one of her sisters up at Chook H. Q. also hatched six chicks on the same day. We are a tad anxious as we see a Harrier Hawk circling, so who knows their chances? Free range can come at a price... if you are a very, very small chick.
This is their only officially sanctioned photo. The family would be grateful if mother and chicks are allowed privacy from paparazzi, etc. |
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19 February 2010
Proprietor’s Jam and Chutneys Put to the Test
Top Palates score top preserves
The Prop, nervous but game, like one of the blokes on Master chef, put his larder up for judgement to a panel consisting of the following discerning gourmets over the weekend:
Dave Dobbyn O.N.Z.M.
Tim Finn O.B.E.
Bic Runga M.N.Z.M.
Bo Runga
Che Fu M.N.Z.M.
Panelists Bo Runga and Che Fu post gig. |
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T. Finn, Bic Runga, D. Dobbyn in full agreement on jam #3. |
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Coincidentally, all the panel were playing a gig Monday night at Millbrook... a minor distraction from their panel duties.
The panel passed the following assessments:
- Apricot and Plum Jam -- 3 stars. Good fruity nature, but disappointing finish.
- Apricot Jam #2 -- 4 stars. Delicious, tangy fruit, but a little critical of its rather runny consistency.
- Apricot Jam #3 -- 5 stars. All round genius.... “you just get it in the first mouthful, and you keep on wanting more B. Runga.”
- Chutney # 1 -- 5 stars. Too good by far “amazing,” etc.
Our thanks to the judges, and also for the incredible jam (bad pun) downstairs afterwards. NZ music rocks!
| The Prop thanks jury foreman Che Fu for his hard work. And musical genius. |
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As a footnote, see Finn and Dobbyn demonstrate how effective a good NZ tailor can be. Sharp as, Bro! |
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18 February 2010
How To Distill Lavender Oil
Do not try this at home
Our lavender oil is painstakingly produced in our lab under time tested rules. Here’s how:
| 1. Bring in harvest of top quality lavender flowers. |
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2. Build still. This is absurdly expensive, so better not. |
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3. [Very important] Train and employ smart woman. Centuries of experience have made it apparent to the French that it is no use at all getting a man to do this, as in so many other areas. (Men are generally too slow to be involved in anything as ethereal as lavender.) In our case, it is our friend Midge, who worked for us for some years, and comes back at harvest time. |
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| 4. Load retort with harvested lavender flowers. |
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5. The still pushes pressurized steam through the lavender. |
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6. The steam, containing the lavender essential oil, cools to a liquid in the condenser.
7. The separator divides the oil from the lavender water, but occasionally a little careful assistance may be required.
Any clearer? No? Well, what do you expect from one who flunked at chemistry, biology, physics and more...
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14 February 2010
Designer Available
Hold the tabloids please
Our designer, the brilliant Dennis Hearfield, (we think it should be told) is no longer as...attached as before (see Our Team). Circumstances have changed and we don’t think it too indiscrete to reveal that he might, if pressed be...er... available.
Please, ladies, don’t rush... please! One at a time...please... |
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12 February 2010
How to Harvest Lavender
In easy peasy steps
At this time of the year we harvest our incredible lavender -- all 43 varieties -- and then distill the world's finest lavender oil from the flowers.
Here’s a handy guide to take you through the process:
1. Plant 43 varieties of lavender in your own patch. Sensible people will think you have gone mad. They will be correct.
2. When your flowers have reached their zenith, select a warm day. Wait for the temperature to reach 25° Celsius. Listen carefully to old hand (Mike), then ignore advice.
Mike has years of experience with flora.
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3. Collect your harvesting machine from the shed. You will not have seen it since last year, so you may have trouble recognizing it. It will be clearly labelled “Tea Cutter.” Except this will be in Japanese, so fly in someone to translate this for you. You will probably have to fly them Business Class or they will lose face.
The selection process for Two Paddocks translator is both competitive and demanding.
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4. Stand and stare at your machine, for at least 10 minutes. This is very important – you cannot expect any machine to respond favorably unless it has been stared at for a good long period. New Zealand farmers have always known this to be true. Remember to stare at your machine as if you mean it. If it has tires – kick them. This will let your machine know who’s boss, and it will start first time. If your machine does not know who is in charge, you can expect trouble all day.
Mike, Keith and Simon are baffled by Japanese logo, but stare the cutter down anyway.
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5. Attach collecting bag, and start machine. If it refuses to start, do not panic. Curse machine loudly, then kick it firmly if you have not already done so. Your machine will fall into line straight away. Trim flowers off bushes.
Harder than it looks.
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6. When bag is full, you can expect it to be equally full of agitated bees. Do not open bag unless you have qualified for the Olympic 100 metres recently, or you are on steroids. Or both. Run. Never look back.
Bees ready to rumble. Now run. RUN!
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7. Return cautiously when bees have dispersed. Rebag, and deliver to Still. Do not expect financial compensation, or even thanks - you have had too much fun.
The crop.
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11 February 2010
Old Dogs
The best
We are aware that Fire, that old and sage canine, has her own following on these pages. For her fans, we present today’s portrait.
Our senior citizen.
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11 February 2010
Inside Scoop
Sources Revealed
Okay, we come clean – our insiders at Government House savoring Two Paddocks Pinot with Prince William and the Governor General were actually our friends from bro'Town. (In the unlikely event you missed it, be sure to see the Prop. featured in the episode "To Sam With Love" in Season 5 of bro'Town, a very funny reversal, sort of, of the Sidney Poitier story.)
Oscar Kightly tells us our wine was amazing, and sends us this candid shot of the team having a drink with H.R.H.
As a bonus, here’s a shot of the Prop. with some of the team after a performance of their brilliant play Going Home, last year, revived in aid of Samoan tsunami relief.
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9 February 2010
Every Batch Different
No stopping the Ironic Chef
Yes, there’s no stopping him now.
Here manager Mark Field models two different batches of apricot jam – same fruit, made two hours apart. The darker version has a certain amount of unbidden caramelisation, but seemingly none the worse for that. The keen eyed observer will notice the Prop. has added a small amount of lemon to the apricot.
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| And here, the Ironic Chef looks reasonably smug after preparing his new chutney yesterday.
Tasting notes to follow. |
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7 February 2010
Guests Welcome
Chaps who know what’s what.
We have, of late, had a few very distinguished visitors who write brilliantly on wine, some of whom we know already and some of whom we have been delighted to meet for the first time, having followed their work for many years.
These include the ebullient Oz Clarke, the hilarious Tim Atkin, the urbane Anthony Gismondi, and the encyclopedic Neal Martin. All were here in connection with the Pinot Celebration held this year in Wellington. Mark Field, manager, attended, as did Dean Shaw.
Mark doesn’t remember a thing. Someone needs to remind the Proprietor to have a word – this has to stop. Trouble is there’s no-one here to remind the Prop. to remember... |
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11 January 2010
How to Grow Hollyhocks
Hollyhocks are perhaps the Proprietor's favourite flower and, indeed, made an appearance on the First Paddock front label one year. This year they have been startlingly good round the vineyards, reaching in many cases easily four metres in height.
Here some pretty pinks are in early flowering. |
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Some tips for those with hollyhock aspirations :
- Screech to a halt outside a garden whose flowers you have admired from afar. Approach owner. Try to look as if this is not a home invasion. As nicely as possible, ask owner if he or she would be kind enough to keep you some seed at end of growing season.
- On receipt of seed, return favour with a bottle or two of Two Paddocks.
- Plant seeds, then put seedlings in favoured spots — sunny and sheltered — soil not important (these in shingle driveway).
- Water occasionally, but keep out of their way. The seeds are doin’ it for themselves!
- Brag to your friends as if you are some kind of innate Hollyhock genius. They may even believe you.
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7 January 2010
Summer At Last
After a decidedly ordinary early summer we think it reasonably safe to say that the season is on the mend. As proof the truck is out taking the sun, and feeling the better for it.
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20 Jan 2010
Royal Privileges
It’s good to be King (one day)
Our moles in High Places tell us Two Paddocks 2007 was served at the reception for Prince William at Government House last week. Good choice.
We are well pleased.
None of us were invited however. Shame really – we scrub up quite well. |
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17 January 2010
The Jam
Genius bottled
In response to cries of incredulity from one or two less than loyal friends re the Proprietor’s culinary skills, we present visual proof that jam making, at least, is well within the realms of the possible for the old chancer. It should be remembered that the kind of competence that one had in the kitchen as a student, for example, does not condemn one forever to the ranks of The Hopeless.
Here the Ironic Chef himself, in the throes of a creative cooking fever, bottles a fresh and fruity jam of unparalleled splendour.
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| This small batch is mixed red and black currant, and top notch it is too. |
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Tips for aspiring jam makers:
- Use small children as unpaid labour at picking time. This will reduce costs markedly, and give the little chisellers a taste of the life of hard and thankless graft they can look forward to.
- Give the same unpaid labourers the occasional day off. Get them fishing. This will put more food on the table, while fooling them into believing this is actually recreation.
- If you are following an actual jam recipe, use less sugar than they say, and simmer for longer.
A day off... |
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11 January 2010
Painter Takes Realist Photograph
Poultry find beaks out of joint
Celebrated artist Grahame Sydney visited last week, and sent us this shot of the feather.
Unsigned, unfortunately.
We have found that the chickens like to hang about the feather, perhaps because they erroneously imagine it to be some tribute to them. It is not. So when G. S. took an evening study on the hill, naturally the chickens insisted on inclusion.
They have let it be known that, although Sydney knows a thing or two about landscape, he has not put them in their best light as they see it.
We say they are lucky to be included at all, and frankly we are getting a bit fed up with their film star type airs and graces.
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11 January 2010
A Brave New Decade
Tempus Fugit
Hard to believe, but we are now entering our 11th year of Bloggery. Sheer bloody minded Bloggery. In 2000, we had hardly heard of a computer (we speak here of the curmudgeonly luddite Proprietor, who, let it be confessed, only started e-mailing in 2009). So it comes as something of a surprise that this fitful piece of fluff and nonsense has in fact spanned the whole of the last decade. As a record of the times, it will never serve as useful testament. Not Pepys then. It may help, however, to give an insight into the puerile and one-eyed mind of the Proprietor. In the unlikely event one might want such an insight. As well as a sporadic record of Matters Two Paddocks.
So... the future beckon. And what of the now?
After a solid year of knocking his pipe out in the time-honoured Arthur Daly manner, the Prop. came back to find both land and personnel in good heart, and Two Paddocks fitter than ever.
Mike has taken up the reins in the vineyard with gusto, and now a year later, has established a bold new leadership that both respects tradition, and is prepared to innovate at the same time -- oh, alright, you’ve heard that kind of thing before -- suffice it to say, we all reckon Mike is bloody good, and he has a loyal following in the vineyard, and great respect and mana among his peers in the district. "Young Viticulturarist of the Year" Respect!
Mark, likewise, is looking Statesmanlike in his role as Manager. He is also living upstairs, so we know what he’s up to, and what he eats (in both cases, not much). Mark has Big Plans for Two Paddocks this year, but we are not allowed to tell you what they are yet. Watch this space.
Dean Shaw, winemaker, powers on with one terrific vintage after the next for T.P. at COWCO. Dean hasn’t smoked for some years now, a fact hard to grasp for those that know him well. Still can make a fool of himself on the dance floor, though. We’ve seen it... not nice at all. Never mind, come Monday he’s back at work as if it never happened. And the wine is gorgeous.
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Currants and gooseberries -- fresh fodder for the proprietor's jam. |
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| Lavender in full bloom -- Bob, Nate and Keith have
all the vineyards looking immaculate. |
The Proprietor has discovered a flair for jam making – so far this season gooseberry, currant, and apricot. All triumphs, although the red and black currant has met with the most acclaim. Not For Sale, unfortunately.
Bob, Nate and Keith are the backbone of the work on the vineyard and on the farm, and they have all the vineyards looking immaculate. They are also much cleaner inside, now that Diane has brought a stern regime of tidyness and hygiene into the staff quarters. She has, as well, brought an orderliness to our books we never thought possible. The trains are running on time!
The animals are fine. The Boss (Fire) is slower – we now estimate her age at 18 yrs – but still as amiable and companionable as ever. The goat. Hamish, however, is sailing close to the wind having escaped several times out of whatever paddock he’s in, and been caught feeding in the flower garden. Such cavalier disregard for Rules and Fences is not to be countenanced. The Proprietor has issued a Stern Warning or two. These may sound like a string of oaths to you, but to a goat they are as good as Stage 1 Criminal Law, 101.
The sheep flourish. At least we think that’s what they are up to. They may be sheepishly plotting a coup d’etat for all we know. But they look well, and that’s the main thing, isn’t it?
The whistle has gone we’re afraid – it is the view of the ref that all this is getting too rural and idyllic by far. Enough already.
And the future can wait. |
Updated: 31 August 2010 |
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