28 April 2008

Heads Down

Ladies and Gentleman; we present Mr Jeffery Williams arse up in the saffron patch. An unappetising sight we grant you, but cooks everywhere will be salivating at the idea of all that Redbank saffron.

Elsewhere, a showbiz type (in the checked shirt) shows off the crocuses from whence cometh this delicious culinary additive.

25 April, 2008

Clyde Rugby A Bit Ordinary

Our 2 I.C Mike “Whacker” Wing is captain of the Clyde Rugby team this year. A team that also features on the wing our own Darryle Tamati. At 48 we calculate Darryle is New Zealand’s oldest winger.

And still a flyer! Sadly so far this year no victories. We blame the ORFU and global warming.

24 April 2008

The Internationale

Grapes in from Alex and Redbank and Dean over excited by quality of fruit. Our pickers this year represent Vanuatu, Aotearoa, Czech Republic, France and South Africa.

We’re often vaguely amazed at how people from all over the world end up in obscure paddocks. Last year we had pickers from Brazil, USA, Holland, Germany, Australia, Isreal and Chile.

23 April 2008

Vintage Update

After last year's very very small vintage (apply now – stocks will be EXTREMELY limited) 2008 looking much more fulsome. As of today both Redbank and Alex are picked and Gibbston First Paddock next week.

Here the Proprietor casts an expert eye over some of this year's Pinot. His other eye is almost entirely ignorant, however.

22 April 2008

Spectacular Foolishness

Somewhat in the vein of the Jancis Robinson interview (see Loose Lips, April 12) the Proprietor found himself cornered in New York City, and spilt more beans to The Wine Spectator. The result, painful to anyone who prefers English to make sense (or at least more or less ordered in sentences, can be seen and heard >>here<<.

19 April 2008

More Lunch

Another Morse message, this time from the Far East.

“Excellent lunch at the Peninsula courtesy of Lillian Haynes, Hong Kong distributor of Two Paddocks. STOP.

Spoke. STOP.

Seems April May T.P. pinot available $HK160 per glass in Peninsula. STOP.

Absolute bargain. STOP.

Present the crème of HK restaurant and club world. STOP.

Kevin Tsang – Peninsula Hotel; Paolo Fassina – Cinecitta; Colin Smith – Wooloomooloo Group; Marc David Nathan – Kee Club; Enrico Cerrato – Divino Group; Gregory Deeb – Crown Wine Cellars; Richard So – Aedes; Nicholas Haddon – G Bar; Vivo – Hayden Winch; Bill Ahern & Sue Salinkow – IWFS. STOP.

Must fly. STOP.

Developing R.S.I. in right wrist from this damn Morse code machine. STOP.

Must learn how to use fax. STOP.

The Proprietor”

April 12 2008

Loose Lips, etc.

Prolonged Morse code message from the Proprietor, interpreted by Mark, who served with distinction in the Signals Corps in Her Majesty’s Cadet Force (a fearsome khaki-clad para-military organization once fielded by all New Zealand Secondary Schools).

“Splendid lunch at (the legendary wine buff) Jancis Robinson’s house in Hampstead. STOP.

Cooked brilliantly by husband Nick. STOP.

Tuna – rare – and spuds from Jersey. STOP.

Also present the excellent Bob Campbell M.W. STOP.

Got fairly rat arsed on excellent Riesling, several German Pinots, Burgundies and some other German whites with very long names. STOP.

Interviewed by Jancis at my most vulnerable. STOP.

Resulting half drunk video can be seen on Jancis’ spiffing site www.jancisrobinson.com. STOP.

Oh dear. STOP.

Hope got away with it. STOP.

Let me know. STOP.

The Proprietor.”

Judge for yourself….

22 April 2008

The Return of the Last Chance

Dean is reasonably confident that after an absence of two years, Alex Paddocks fruit will be of such excellence that we can this year make another single vineyard Pinot from there – The Last Chance.

Here it is in one of our splendid oak fermentation tanks and here also is Dean.

14 April, 2008

Living It Large

Is there a Weightwatchers for piggies? Here at H.Q. we are shifty and elusive when passers-by make mention of the rotund nature of our potbelly pigs, Peggy and Polly. The girls have rather a good time of it at this time of the year, cleaning up fruit windfalls, acorns etc. (yum). But probably too good a time of it.

Maybe time for a pig dietitician. Or a pig trainer. Or a sign-up at a pig gym. Motivation may be a problem. When the Proprietor passes by and suggests a bit of a walk, the pigs roll their eyes, and sigh and turn away.

Having had a similar response from his children for years, his feelings are hardly even hurt.

7 April 2008

Harvest Begins

To our esteemed Brian Croot the honour of picking this year’s first grapes – from the Riesling Paddock. All looking fab. Further report at end of harvest (early May, all things being equal.)

6 March 2008

Rugby Heaven

Alright, close your eyes and answer this question. No peeking. What rugby side currently sports, among others, the following stars?

George Gregan (Aus), Andrew Mehrtens, Anton Oliver, Orene Ai’i (N.Z), Victor Matfield (S.A.), Dan Luger (Eng)

Give up? Answer : Toulon.

29 March 2008

Tree Crops

Today a visit from the N.Z. Tree Crops Conference, who enjoy our trees almost as much as we do. Tree hugging is much enjoyed at H.Q. ... Quietly.

27 March 2008

Spud City: N.Z. Gothic

While it is true that Man Cannot Live on Bread Alone, a chap can pretty much live on potatoes only. Indeed the Irish have repeatedly, over the centuries, shown this to be so.

Here at Two Paddocks we revere the humble Potato. Particularly the humble organic potato.
Today the boys lifted the last of this years crop, and a bumper one at that.

Pictured left to right: --Nathan Corlett --Brian Croot --Darryle Tamati --James Taylor        Potato types left to right: --Desiree --Jersey Bennie --Makoikoi --Urenika --Moe Moe

13 April 2008

How to Wear a Hat

Here at H.Q. we are always happy to help. As part of our constant effort to enlighten and inspire, we tender the following advice on How to Wear a Hat.

1. Purchase a fashionable and practical piece of headgear, i.e. a hat.
2. Go outside.
3. Turn hat around in the light. You will notice it usually has a hollow bit approximately half the size of your head.
4. Raise hat above head.
5. Lower the hollow bit, gently but firmly onto the top of said head.
6. Admire result, and wait for flattering attention.

The Proprietor models vintage Two Paddocks Hat after following the above instructions, while modestly accepting flattering comments from vino aficionado, and old Two Paddocks friend, Geraldo Nucifora. Pigeon Island, Lake Wakatipu, 2008.

18 March 2008

St Patrick’s Day

The Proprietor, abroad again, found himself in New York City this week, and with a moment or two to reflect on things. Not things of substance, you understand. That would be well beyond his meagre powers.

Stuck on 5th Avenue, after visiting the august offices of the WINE SPECTATOR and forced to contemplate the St Patrick’s Day Parade, the following random questions came to mind.

1. Why, in America, is screaming the ultimate sign of approval?
2. Who comes up with the extraordinarily baroque and bizarre designs for uniforms worn by marching bands?
3. Can it really be true that there are so many Irish people in New York?
4. How is it that so many people of Irish extraction ended up in the wine business? (Lynch, Barton, Hennessy, the Proprietor etc.)
5. Why is it, given that the staple crop in Ireland for 500 years was the potato, the Irish never invented, let alone made, vodka?
6. Is marching harmless? (Probably depends on where you choose to march)
7. Which of the Fates decided, seemingly randomly, to bring Holly Hunter, Harvey Keitel and Sam Neill together without any foreknowledge, in the same room at the same time (Saturday night) for the first time since the screening of The Piano at Cannes in 1994? Or is it just A Small World After All?
8. How cool an actor is Emily Mortimer?
9. Is New York City completely and utterly amazing? (of course)

Any help on these baffling questions gratefully received.

25 February 2008

Annual Two Paddocks Awards

Yes, it’s the time of year when our generosity overflows, the time when we almost drown in the milk of human kindness. Actually that’s not entirely true – this is a random process that can happen at any time of the year. Random: like the Proprietor’s brain.

We send off cases of Two Paddocks to New Zealanders in any field that have given the Proprietor some pleasure or pride recently.

This year – so far – the WINNERS ARE:

• Kora: A brilliant N.Z. band. Highly recommended!
• Bic Runga: Wonderful chanteuse and multi-TP winner.
• Richie McCaw: A.B.s captain. Outstanding.
• Yu Takayama: Top N.Z. Ballet dancer. We also sponsor her from Two Paddocks.
• Max Wild: Architect to the Stars.
• Bill Hammond: Great N.Z. painter. This year he was kind enough to paint one of his famous birdmen on the Proprietors Les Paul guitar!
• The Wellington International Ukulele Orchestra: Sublime.

Congrats to all winners. Don’t drink it all at once! We know it’s tempting!

15 February 2008

Vineyard Manager's House Completed

Richard and Cherie have moved into Chateau Banque Rouge (see photos) with some satisfaction. Beautiful job by Max Wilde (architect to the stars) and well crafted by Breens (builders to the stars). House features heated kennel for company dog, which is duly ignored in favour of kids’ beds. [Note to Proprietor: Need to call Dog Whisperer? Kid Whisperer?]

8 February 2008

Redbank and Last Chance Fully Organic

Reports of rioting and celebration as far as Rio de Janeiro this week with the news, as of 8th February 2008, that our vineyards at Alex and Earnscleugh are both fully organic – certified to Bio-Gro N Z Organic Standard. So it’s official.

Mark plans a float for Mardi gras next year to mark this historic turn of events – the question is Rio, Sydney, Alexandra … mmm?

6 February 2008

Hideous Beast Stalks Our Animals

Waitangi Day celebrations at Redbank marked by startling disturbances in the animal department. Stampedes and noisy alarums – whinnying, squeals, baahing: all of this sounded like terror had struck the fold.

However it seems a visit by Hugh Jackman, in full WOLVERINE mode, had our flock not in fear but instead in a lather. Hugh graciously stood up to the stampede looking for autographs. The Suffolk sheep in particular have been Wolverine fans – funny old world! Many chickens happily back to the chookrun with Hugh’s signature under their wing, what a gent!

3 February 2008

And Still More Culture

“Wine makes a man more pleased with himself. I do not say it makes him more pleasing to others.”

Another brainy quote – this time from that wise, if not always sober, philosopher Dr Johnson. We, of course, concur.

We quote this in turn from a book we recommend wholeheartly: How to Drink a glass of Wine by John Saker (Awa Press). John spoke elegantly and informatively at our Pinot lunch last month, and our thanks for that. Good book, John, and good speech. (See the entry for 27 January 08 below – that’s John sounding off in the far corner.)

2 February 2008

More Culture

The Proprietor, back from points foreign, looking momentarily … well… cultured!  This will pass. He reports having seen The National Theatre of Scotland The Black Watch (“great”) Rufus Wainwright (“absolutely superb”) La Clique Cabaret (“a gas”) Brian Wilson (“THE icon”) Also happy to report that Two Paddocks readily found in Sydney now – he tracked it to Kemeny’s, Five Way Cellars, and Australia’s top Japanese restaurant – Azuma.

29 January 2008

Cultured Two Paddocks

“Quickly, bring me a beaker of wine, so I may wet my mind and say something clever.”
     —Aristophanes

Why do we quote the above? Well, firstly we find it amusing. And secondly we want to give the impression that here at H.Q. we are erudite, widely read, scholarly types. Would it were so!

Here’s another one, from The Bacchae:

“To rich and poor alike he (Dionysus) granted the delight of wine, that makes all pain to cease.”
     —Euripides

Spookily the Proprietor once appeared in this play, as Pentheus, unfortunately – not the above mentioned Dionysus. Small world! Another wisely forgotten performance…

Alright, just to reinforce how brainy we are, here’s one more:

“Wine was given (to man) as a balm, and in order to implant modesty in the soul, and health and strength in the body.”
     —Plato

Are we impressed yet?

28 January 2008

Happy Days

More proof, if any were needed, that owners tend to LOOK LIKE THEIR PETS.
(See 2 Apr 07) Or is it the other way around? Whatever, the Proprietor and the Company Dog have been practicing synchronizing their doggy grins, with pleasing results.

With thanks to Bob Campbell M.W. for photo.

23\7 January 2008

Central Otago Pinot Celebration

Another successful event, and T.P. playing its part as ever. Well done Mark.

On the Saturday we hosted a lunch for 26 at Redbank with an excellent array of visitors from Australia, U.S. etc. Even Ireland! Food splendid, courtesy of “Feast” in Cromwell. Well done Natasha and Fish. Top Day.

23 January 2008

R.I.P. Good People

R.I.P.   Ed Hillary. Great man. Good bloke.

R.I.P.   Hone Tuwhare. Great poet. Good bloke

R.I.P.   George Chance. Optician, soldier, fisherman, photographer, conservationist. Good bloke.

R.I.P.   Kath Hay. Great mum. Good sort.

R.I.P.   Heath Ledger.  Top actor. Good  bloke.

Very sad month.

12 January 2008

Sightings of the Proprietor Back at Work

A Day’s Pick-up on the Red Meat Commercials

Rumours of a new commercial involving the Proprietor and a chicken have been confirmed by the former; indeed he says that the chickens (there were more than one) were as good and professional actors as he’s ever worked with. Both actor and chicken free-range and G.M. free, and on similar fees – although you might need to check that with the chickens agents. At least one of these chickens, it seems, has headed to L.A. and is up for a film with George and Nicole.

10 January 2008

Birthday Bash

Photographs just in of a party held late last year at Redbank, enjoyed by staff and livestock alike, to mark the (absent) Proprietor's birthday.

Elsewhere, Proprietor, Bryan Brown and friends enjoyed knees-up in Sydney. How old they are remains a mystery, although Sam looks at least 40. Brian – about 70, but then he’s had a much tougher life and smoked while at school.

1 January 2008

A New Year Dawns

Here at H.Q. a new year dawns, and Management and Staff brace themselves as best they can for the challenges ahead. But first it might be timely to learn from the past year, and hope that lessons have been learnt.

Let us hope for no repeats of:

The Great Ram Fiasco  (See 3 May 2007) -- An update:

• Manky ram interlopers: 27 lambs
• Thoroughbred rams (Mel and Jimmy) 7 lambs
• Result: an overwhelming defeat for breeding and refinement.

The Car-eating Dog Affair  (See 6 Jan 2007) -- The Dog in question is still silent on her crimes, but the car, now Cooper-intacta again, is parked more discretely away from the predations of canine omnivores.

The Sad Pig Breeding Anticlimax (See 4 Sept 2007) -- Peggy and Polly’s long pregnancies unfortunately have, after a time of wonder, turned out to be just phantoms. They were it seems, simply (let’s be blunt here) just bloody fat. Boris, their boyfriend from down the road, despite weeks of red hot lurve-action in the bottom paddock has sired absolutely zero piglets. All are baffled – it’s not as if our girls are unattractive (see winsome shot of Peggy 2 April 2007). Boris may be, well, only half the pig he seems….

On the upside:

Vintage -- This last year we released our 2006’s – Another remarkable vintage and one we were delighted with. Angry scenes however as the Proprietor selfishly attempted to put it all in his own cellar. Physical restraint necessary.

2007’s in the barrel as we speak and looking excellent – Proprietor spotted lurking around winery with enormous pipette…

International Success -- Here at T.P. we never enter our wine into competitions. This last year however we were flattered to be asked to the Stoniers International Pinot Event in Sydney, and were delighted with how well we showed beside some of the worlds very best Pinots. Modesty forfends, etc…

Proprietor Otherwise Occupied -- Things tick along absolutely fine at H.Q. and around the vineyards when the Boss is away. Last year, 2007, he was away for about 9 months on 5 different movies; it is to be hoped that various strikes do not keep him too much at home and pretending to run things.

Incidentally he worked twice last year with the great Peter O’Toole, a source of a thousand grand stories about actors, movies and so on. The Proprietor has stored these in the back of his undertaxed brain, and is happy to pass on the less salacious of these for a very large fee.